TODAY

I am utterly mortified to show to the public a post with the title TODAY. Alas, you probably need one of those at one point in your blogging career. I know I do. And furthermore, I should probably start telling ABOUT TODAY, note the title. Well, today...

I'm not that good at describing current events in a very hilarious way. Maybe I should just rely 100% on Junie B. Jones's sense of humor. I don't know. Maybe not. I think it would be too obvious that I used a fictional kindergartener's sense of humor. See, at this exact moment, I am SEARCHING my brain to find something quirky and funny all on it's own. It's not working, obviously. Well... TODAY. That's hard to expain when it's 8:30 in the morning and everyone is STILL in bed. Notice how everyone is ASLEEP when I find time to write? I'm an early riser and I fall asleep REALLY quickly. Really.

Why is it that I have to start a whole new paragraph to write about today? I thought I already did that, but of COURSE I completly miss the point and start ranting about complete other things. I hope you enjoy that kind of writing, because that's what you're gonna get. Ok, today. Well, as you can see, I've gotten up early to make breakfast for all my siblings. Probably just toast, because if I make anything else, then I'll probably end up burning it. I could even burn the toast. I could burn PUDDING if I wanted to. Then I'll pour some coffee for mom, and maybe (probably) pour some for myself, (mwa ha ha ha ha ha!) then lounge around the house with my teeth and hair unbrushed, still in my pajamas, and drinking 4 steaming mugfuls of caffinated coffee. The joys of summer.

UNLESS of course, some authority figure comes and yells at me to get dressed. (aka: mother) Actually, I usually lead my readers to believe that she is some sort of monster-alien creature, with yellow teeth and rancid meat chuncks coming out of them, and a temper like there is no tomorrow. She is not. Sorry, folks, for disappointing you like this.

I will probably (Hey! Notice how often I have used the word, 'probably' here. PLUS: I have 'probably' spelled it wrong EVERY SINGLE TIME!) end up going with plan A, because plan B doesn't have an ending yet. Yet. Ok, here is the ending. I end up getting dragged to someplace like... uh... Frank and Susie's Blissful Meat Shoppes! Woot woot!

You know what I think I should be able to do? I think we should be able to go BLUEBERRY PICKING. Oh yum. And for LUNCH, we could have CHICKEN ALFREDO PASTA! Oh... double yummers. And we could stay there all day, eating chicken alfredo and blueberries. Fab.

Summer is one of the best times of year. Because it is so HOT out. Mind you, 30 degrees is NOT good in MY books. The weather doesn't care about my books, though.

You know, my mom was reading my blogs, and they didn't sound AS funny as when I was writing them. Like, she kept a straight face the whole time, and so did I. I thought I was being hilarious, but then- like- it WASN'T funny! ~Sigh~

So be sure to laugh